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My Nappily Ever After

Updated: Aug 28, 2019

The struggle of a black young girl is so real. You've probably already watched the movie on Netflix with the said title and it may have resonated with most of the black women out there. Well I did not realise I was a slave to my own hair until I made a graciously bold decision not too long ago. A decision I somewhat regretted the moment I was getting it done. A decision that gave me mixed emotions right after it was done. A decision that eventually gave me so much peace, joy and liberation moments after, till this day.

Growing up, I always had my hair french braided and straightened with a pressing comb stove iron. If you grew up in my era and in Africa you'll know what I'm talking about (Fig.1). Coming from the tropical part of the world, my hair was so long, kinky and thick. It required some straightening for me not to feel pain when combing it. Back then and at my age, putting chemicals on my hair to straighten it, was not even an option.

Fig. 1 If you know, you know.

I grew up being told I looked like my dad and my brother. So clearly felt as though I was an ugly baby because I was being told that I look like men. But then again I was my father's daughter and still am my brother's sister, I'm bound to inherit some of their looks init. All this made me feel insecure about the way I looked and felt my beauty was found in having long hair. I even heard guys say they'd never date a woman with short hair. That right there did not make it any easier.

Now here we are today, short hair is trending like never before. Never did I think I would actually join the trend because I'm usually among the trend setters. Besides, I grew up believing that "beauty was found in having long hair." Even in fake hair - yes I said it, fake hair! I was wrong. I remember watching Nappily Ever After on Netflix not too long ago even and the first thing that came to my mind was "hmmm heck no, not me! I wouldn't dare. Not in a million years." But there's a saying that goes never say never and this is true.

Cutting my hair has been one of the best things I've done this year so far and I don't regret it at all. I feel more beautiful, confident, free, joyful but most importantly more natural and it feels fabulous. I am so in tune with myself and not so much as my appearance. I love myself even more. I'm truly on point in my life, where I couldn't care any less about others opinions of me. It has helped me to make a couple of changes in other areas of my life that I never thought I would, with my never do this attitude. I'm living for me, to be the best version of me and that's that. I've since officially learnt that for you to move into a new season, you have to change your old habits, attitude and BELIEFS. Let go of the old habits because old habits won't open new doors.

What are you afraid of making change in your life? Why are you afraid to make that change? Just go right ahead and NIKE (just do it), see how that goes. Change is never painful. Only the resistance to change is what's painful. I hope to inspire you to be YOU, despite society's expectations. Stay authentic! Stay beYOUtiful! You're dope! PERIODT!

I love my Nappily Ever After!

With Love,


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